crashed. crushed.

for the first time in 10 years that i have been using apple computers, i experienced a crash. at first, i didn't think that it was a crash. it's just my-macbook-doesn't-want-to-boot type. and there's a white screen no matter what i do.

i called the gurus and the apple support people. i was redirected to an indian-sounding guy since my call was made from the philippines. he told me, with utmost certainty that the problem was "99% about the hardware" and that he couldn't say a hundred percent because i didn't have my dvd boot with me. so much for utmost certainty.

he directed me to go to the authorized apple reseller and service center in makati. i left my precious macbook to them last week and i was told that i'll hear from them through email in a day or two.

the day or two passed by. day 3, 4, 5. i was beginning to get giddy. and excited. and worried. so i called them up. i was informed by the engineer that it was a hard drive problem. the hd won't mount so they need to replace it.

today, i got my macbook back. it's almost brand new. i read the service order that came with it, and in bold letters, it shouted "NO DATA RECOVERED".

part of me died.

thousands of memorable photos. thousands of songs. thousands of documents. thousands of articles. i feel like crying now. i'm still in a state of denial.

how can apple do this to one of their loyal followers? how can apple fail me colossally like this? my macbook is barely a year old, and this happens? my iBook lasted me 3 years before i upgraded to MacBook. my personal iMac is still working even if it's already six years old. and this MacBook dies on me just like that? it's unacceptable.

just thinking of the memories i lost. stuff i've written. photos i took. songs i sang. a few iMovies i was working on. all my work-related stuff. gone in a jiffy. just like that. no f*cking way. no f*cking way.

i'm a mess. if only apple didn't spoil me like that. when i was a pc user, i used to back up, back up, back up my stuff. never mind redundancy, i had back up. i tried doing that the first few years into my apple bliss. i realized i didn't need to back up because the mac never crashes. now that is one f*cking lie. sorry i'm so bitter right now.

i'm so full of hate now i pity the person who will irritate the hell out of me later.